Ghost Host A Re-Post
Raaaaaaaandy Part 3. Raaaaaaaandier than ever. With a taste of Ol’ Youngin’. Just enough to make you want the whole slice.
While I’m here re-posting, Summer Crush Kat Dennings has a blog. It is funny and smart and adorable. Go there and start your own Summer crush.
Kat Dennings is almost too adorable for life. She gives me that baby bunny feeling; I want to squeeze her until her head pops off. Aren’t Summer crushes the cutest?
In other news, Twitter alerted me to an oversight I must correct inmediatamente:
Happy belated birthday Soulja Boy!
Another year older, another year wiser.
Sorry I didn’t get a Tweet in on-time, Soulja. You know I love you, Kid.
My name is Ben and I blogged this.
Repost Part Twosday
Who knew Tuesdays were for whoring out?
It’s Two for Repost Tuesdays, Mr. & Mrs. Bitches. Two Part Twos. That’s right, I respectfully called you bitches. What of it, sir or madam? I got you again.
First up for seconds is Raaaaaaaandy. Aziz is back as the spirited comic Randy, but noticeably missing is DJ Ol’ Youngin’. Noticeable, but not surprising. He broke the #1 rule for DJs: Never outshine the rapper. I miss you Ol’ Youngin’, but Aziz tears it up on his own:
Segundo numero dos is the theatrical trailer for Derrick Comedy’s Mystery Team. What can be said about this film that hasn’t already? By me? On this site? Here’s one thing. Not enough non-horror Halloween-time movies are made nowadays. This is one and that’s exciting. So watch the trailer and start getting geeked for its Fall release.
No DJ Ol’ Youngin in that video either. Has Youngin’ been blacklisted already?! Just kidding, there was no reason for the DJ to make an appearance in the Mystery Team trailer. But would it have hurt?
My name is Ben and I blogged this for the Bitches.
Move Over RAAAAAAAANDY!
Re-post Thursday features the latest Aziz Ansari/Jason Woliner viral “RAAAAAAAANDY” video for Apatow’s Funny People. This DJ made my day!
Who the fuck is DJ Ol’ Youngin’? My internet searches have come up empty. I have a guess, but am afraid to posit it. An incorrect guess is a positive test result for racism. I’m not falling into that trap. No sir. Fine, I’ll take my stab. Is it OJ? Get it? Take my stab? Because he’s a knife-murderer? Nothing? Y’all are racists.
Aziz is really funny in this, but Ol’ Youngin’ (whoever he may be) and his three rules they live by steal the show. If you have any information as to the secret identity of this unmasked DJ, please contact me at 1-800-LEAVEAFUCKINGCOMMENT. I seriously do have a guess and I seriously won’t go public with it. White people, we live in constant fear.
DJ reveal thyself!
I’ve got so many parts for this man. Find me, Ol’ Youngin’!
My name is Ben and I blogged this manhunt.
I may have spoken too soon on Aziz Ansari.
If you haven’t been following the madness taking place at Aziz is Bored, let me bring you up to speed. Aziz Ansari went to see some screening of Star Trek on a bogus, small IMAX screen and, feeling duped, asked for a refund of the IMAX portion of his ticket.
Aziz then took to the digital networks and told everyone that would read it to boycott these lying theatres. Here is where things got out of hand. Most readers seemed to agree with the principle of his plight, but took great offense to his approach. This fabricated re-telling of his confrontation led to a lot of hate mail:
My comic of the year done shot himself in the funny bone! The line about 25,000 Twitter followers blew up in his face most explosively. He claims that it was a joke, but most people don’t believe him. I don’t believe it was a joke, and I say that as a compliment to Aziz. Aziz jokes are funny, and there is nothing funny about that line. I also believe that the snarkiness attributed to the comment is actually just his misinterpreted frustration. The “25,000 followers” are not meant to be inflected; the “telling people about fake IMAX theatres” is.
In the sense that he is attempting to combat injustice, Aziz should applauded. The fact that he seems wholly aware that he is fighting the good fight tempers some the heroism. The further fact that this is all about small vs. big movie screens negates most of the heroics. This is the argument you can’t drop, Aziz? Richard Gere has Tibet. Hayden Panetierre has whale blubber or something. You’re telling me you are less substantive than the gerbil-anus guy and a teenage television tart?
In the original post, Aziz references Darfur as one of many far more pressing concerns, practically screaming out loud “I KNOW THIS IS PETTY!” But if he truly knew how petty this was he would do everything in his power to make it go away. Instead, he is taking it further. In a follow-up post he challenges IMAX CEO Richard Gelfond to a television debate about fake IMAX. Are you kidding me, Aziz?
1) Haven’t we suffered through enough televised debates in the last year? 2) People don’t want to see that. They found the ten-paragraph blog too long. 3) God will strike down anyone who attempts to discuss this subject for more than five minutes. If you live through this debate it disproves God, elevating this debate from totally insouciant to all-life-changing. 4) No. Just no.
The post is silly and meaningless. The ensuing defensiveness is becoming an embarrassment. Is it a coincidence that all this happens shortly after Aziz starts rolling with Kanye West? I knew ’Yeezy was going to be a bad influence on him.
Aziz welcomes the Kantroversye.
My name is Ben, I blogged this, and thankfully I didn’t blog that. This site couldn’t hold up to that kind of controversy.
Never Doubt Me
I told you this was The Year of Aziz! If you haven’t seen him do stand-up recently (or ever) then you probably don’t know who Cousin Harris is. You poor, lost soul. Let me take you in and nourish you with warm funny:
That’s just the tip of the Harris iceburg. The Cousin Harris material was easily my favorite of 2008. But this post isn’t actually about Harris. No, Harris has an older brother named Darwish, and Darwish has engaged one of rap’s largest luminaries in a battle of words. Aziz documents it on his blog. This is must-read:
DARWISH VS. KANYE
What happens when one of hip hop’s greatest and some silly little Indian kid from Georgia go head to head in an email/IM battle?
My little cousin Darwish, brother of Harris (whom someone of you may know from my standup) is quickly catching up to Harris in terms of ridiculousness. Last week, he finally discovered Kanye West’s music and went nuts. He started a firing off a ton of IMs:
Dar: Aziz
Dar: Kanye West is ridiculous
Dar: HAVE YOU EVER HEARD AMAZING???
Dar: IT REALLY IS AMAZING
Aziz: Yeah, he’s great right?
Dar: when he goes around bragging
Dar: now I know why
Dar: wow
Dar: JUST WOW
10 minutes later…
Dar: aziz I think this is like the 10th time ive listened to amazing in a row
Dar: i was just like browsing and I found it it
Dar: and boom! my head was just auto bobbing
Aziz: go download Flashing Lights, that’s probably my favorite Kanye song
Dar: who’s someone else good?
Aziz: You ever listened to any Wu Tang?
Dar: no but i’ve heard of him
Dar: he raps a lot about karate right?
Kanye knows of Harris and Darwish through my standup so I emailed him Darwish’s IMs.
Kanye responded:
woooow! new fans yeeeessss!!!! more people that don’t hate me
BUT 10 minutes later I received this from Darwish…
To read more click on this link.
Just a taste. It’s his post, if you want to read more you have to do it at his site. I am many things, sir, but one of them is NOT a blog jacker. Black jogger, yes. Blog jacker, no. I can see how you got confused.
And don’t forget, Aziz co-stars in the new NBC comedy Parks and Recreation starting next Thursday at 8:30. I will remind you again next week, because that’s what I do. I’m like your comedy administrative assistant. You have a comedy video conference call with Amy Poehler and Aziz Ansari booked for next Thursday at 8:30pm in the NBC room. Do try to be prompt.
My name is Ben and this Ansari fella owes my blog an advertising thank you.
My Name is Ben
